Because I Said So

When I was a little girl, and my parents told me to do something, or not do something, there were no ifs, ands or buts about it. BUT I did sometimes do this game with my father:

“Waarom?”

“Daarom.”

“Waarom daarom?”

“Daarom waarom daarom.”

“Waarom daarom waarom daarom?”

Etc., until I lost count.

Now I do the same with my kids:

“Why?”

“Because.”

“Why because?”

“Because because.”

“Why because because?”

“Because because because.”

“Why because because because?”

“Because because because because.”

“Why because because because because?”

“Because because because because, because.”

“Why because because because because because?”

“Because because because because because because.”

“Why because because because because because because?”

“Because because because because because because because.”

Etc., until someone loses count.  I just thought I’d share that, if for no other reason than that it looks neat. But also because I took the daily writing challenge of a few days ago, which was to pick a random word and Google it on Images, and pick the eleventh image to write about. I picked a random word with my eyes closed. It was “because”. The eleventh image on Google Images was the one pictured above. My post about politeness came about the same way. It’s a pretty cool way to come up with ideas.

Texas Politeness and One of My Rare Better Moments

(Photo: farmwars.info)

One thing I’ve learned is the difference between Dutch politeness and Texan politeness.

To A Texan, being polite is not just a matter of saying please and thank you, holding the door open for the person coming behind you, not belching loudly at the dinner table, etc. It also means avoiding embarrassing someone.

U TTLY KWIM, Right?

Photo: Wikipedia

One of the many enjoyable things about translating is that I’m always learning something new, no matter how short the text. I just finished translating a sample from a Belgian novel for middle-school-aged girls, in which the characters communicate face-to-face, on the phone, via email and via texting. 

Let’s Quash This Rich, Arsenic, Vaginal Sea Level Uprising

Two female democrat representatives for Michigan, Lisa Brown and Barb Byrum,  were barred from participating in a debate about abortion because Lisa Brown said the following in her statement: “I’m flattered that you’re all so interested in my vagina, but no means no.”

A Bit of Uncharacteristic Mushiness

Okay, for those of you who think I’m too negative about America, let me confuse you again.

Do I seem schizophrenic to you? Well, that’s because I am. Not clinically, but being Dutch in America, I can’t help being in a permanent schizophrenic state of mind. Depending on what I’m

Ten American Things I’ll Never Get Used To

Photo: motivators.com

Although I’ve lived here for 18 years now, and although there are a lot of things I’ve gotten used to and in some cases even adopted, there are some things that, by now it’s safe to say, I’ll never get used to. Here are ten of them.

1. Bobby socks for men. Yep, men here (including T) often wear socks that barely show above the shoe, just like girl bobby socks in the fifties. The only difference is the absence of pompoms. I know they’re considered perfectly normal here, but to me they will always look ridiculous. Sorry, guys.

The Big No-no

photo: http://www.zazzle.com

Brace yourselves!

I am going to commit one of the biggest faux pas you can commit in America. I’m going to correct your grammar, Americans!

Yes, my Dutch friends, it’s considered impolite at best to correct anyone’s grammar here.When you do, people think you’re pedantic, rude, or a “grammar nazi”.

I will write about the inflation of the word “nazi” some other time.

So back to you, my American readers. Let me explain myself.

The Gap

 The first time I visited America, at age 18, I visited my great aunt and her husband in Bakersfield, California.

The evening I arrived, we went out to dinner at an Elk Lodge and at some point after we had finished our meal, my great aunt asked me if I wanted to join her in the restroom. I replied that I wasn’t really tired, but she insisted.

So I followed her, fully expecting a room with lots of couches and chairs

And the Award Goes To . . .

Fork in My Eye is a wonderful, varied blog. Great photos, smart, funny, inspiring writing. Check it out. The blogger was given the ABC Award. In return she had to give it to five other bloggers, and she included me. Thank you! This is fun, because now I get to give to five more bloggers. But first I have to tell something about myself for every letter of the alphabet.

My Relationship With Dictionaries

The Daily Post today is about dictionaries. It concludes with the question what dictionaries are to me and if I have any favorites.

Well, it wasn’t love at first sight, I can tell you that. In fact, I avoided dictionaries as a youngster–too much hassle. I preferred the DIY method: inference through context.

As a student in library school I learned extensively about all imaginable dictionaries, but it was one of the most boring classes. Probably because the teacher had the stage presence of a bibliography of bibliographies. Dictionaries were a necessity, a useful tool, but I still wasn’t turned on.

Book Spine Poetry 2… and 3

I did say of the previous book spine poem that it was the first installment, during this national poetry month. But as some of you may have noticed, I have a hard time following up on stuff. (I wasn’t always like that; I blame it on menopause.)  Book spine poetry also turns out to be harder than I thought.

NaPoMo

It’s National Poetry Month! I’m no good at poetry, but via The Daily Post I came across this really cool idea for making book spine poetry here. So that got me going. Here is my highly existential first installment.

Interesting Code!

We Dutch are world-famous for our directness, so American conversations require a whole new set of skills. In my previous post, I wrote about an example of what Americans say and what they mean. There’s a lot of that. I have figured most of it out by now–at least I think I have.  But that doesn’t leave me any less mystified.

Take “That’s interesting”.

I Love You

Another post in the “Weird Things Americans Say” spirit.

When my brand new American boyfriend T–now my husband for 18 years–first spoke to his parents on my phone in the Netherlands, he ended the call with telling his parents he loved them, apparently in response to them telling him the same.

That was weird to me. My parents and I had never

The Meaning of Shit

I opened my oven drawer yesterday, and was immediately reminded of a language misunderstanding I had years ago.

Ask a Silly Question…

One thing I will never get used to, even though I do sometimes ask it myself nowadays, is the American question “Are you okay?”. Because it’s per definition asked when someone is clearly not okay.

D-E Translating: A Link to the Website

Quality Dutch-English translations of fiction and texts related to the social sciences.

For some reason my blog–which is unrelated to my translating work–is easier to find on search engines than my professional website.

So I’ve included this post on my blog to refer anyone who is looking for a Dutch-English translator to my website.  Please click here to get to my translation website, which has all the information you need.

Thank you.

Language Confusion

Being from the Netherlands, I speak four languages. Or at least, I did. Dutch was my mother tongue. English, French and German were taught from seventh grade onward. I lived in Australia from age 4 to 10, so I was excused from English class. I only had to take the exams each year.

Rated R

No, really. This post is rated R. So go away, kiddos.

Is Our Children Learning?

Notes From a University Student  12

In order to be a teaching assistant, I had to take a course on how to teach writing. Other than that it was annoying that students in Mexico were taking the course long-distance and that the technical difficulties were interrupting the flow, I have no memory of learning how to teach writing. But I got an A and now I’m a teaching assistant. In the English department of this university being a teaching assistant doesn’t mean I assist anybody. I just teach. I teach two classes of university students Remedial English.

An Aai For an Eye

My (at the time 2-year-old) son says almost everything in English, but he does understand my Dutch. It does lead to misunderstandings, though, like recently at the zoo. I told him he could give the goat an “aai” (a pat), so he promptly poked the poor beast in the eye. Later, at home, we practiced patting his pet monkey, giving it lots of “aaien,” because the next animal may not be as forgiving as that goat was.

Say What?!

Dutch Sayings